Yesterday I went to Home Depot to pick up a gift
I Bruce had (belatedly) ordered for the fiance for Father’s Day (Yes, Bruce gets us gifts for Mother’s Day & Father’s Day. What kind of furry son would he be if he didn’t!?) and as I was pulling out of the parking lot, it struck me how grown up I felt. The only times I’d ever been to Home Depot were as a whiny companion to my father and a couple of misguided paint trips (you should have seen my bedroom in high school). So as I was driving along Route 46 feeling so proud of myself for being a big girl at Home Depot, another thought struck me. Grown ups aren’t usually proud of themselves for being grown up, are they? Or maybe they are? I couldn’t tell you considering I’m barely one myself (see almost every post written on this blog), but why not be proud of yourself for doing the mundane tasks? It’s super easy to go wedding dress shopping, but writing your vows? That ish is hard!
Which brings me to my next grown up task. I’m currently trying to write my vows for my upcoming wedding and while it’s not impossible, it’s definitely hard. As a writer (kind-of?), you would think this would come easily to me, especially considering I have a predilection for telling my fiance I love him every 30 seconds, but finding the right words to convey your feelings while they’re being said in front of 150 of your closest friends and family? Makes me want to go ask Shakespeare what to write. Or maybe Gerard Butler. He had some good ideas in that movie with Katherine Heigl (vibrating undies? helloooo). Also, my go-to-tool, Google, hasn’t been as much help as say looking up movie times or
cheating confirming answers in trivia. Although I may have found some structure to my vows, Google obviously wasn’t like, “Hey Linds, say this to Ron on your wedding day!” Although I have some good ideas, I’m still not sure it’s right.
Oh, add to the scary-ness that Ron’s vows will probably be awesome, and my anxiety starts to build. My fiance is not a very mushy guy. Or at least he’s not after I’ve already hugged and kissed him a thousand times between getting home from work and dinner, but regardless, he doesn’t talking about feeeeeeeeelings that often. It was definitely odd trying to decide who would marry us since neither of us are particularly religious or have been to church recently. We immediately thought it would be more personal and befitting to us for his uncle to marry us, but before we went about making it official, we figured it would make sense to meet with someone who actually officiated weddings for a living. We set up an appointment to meet at Starbucks (yummm) with a priest I found through theknot.com message boards (oh, that is a whole other post, ladies). I seriously think this guy is the male version of Mother Theresa. After listening to his laundry list of good deeds and being assured we’d have an officiant should he “be hit by a car” (Ron didn’t want to ask the 90 year old man the real question), the priest (minister? father? I have no idea. We’ll go with priest.) asked us why we were getting married. Ron answered first and must have been saving all of his mushy love feeling talks for that exact moment because I seriously almost cried and was so busy listening to his mini-speech, I totally forgot to think of what to say and ended up with something along the lines of “me too. And I love him.” Um, duh. So I’d really rather not have the same thing happen on our wedding day. I wouldn’t say it’s a competition because Ron is really scary as an opponent, but it’s on. Just kidding. I really just want to have beautiful, meaningful vows that sound like they came from me rather than a book. I want to be able to tell Ron exactly how I feel about him and why I want to marry him while still keeping it just a few minutes long and literate (which this post may be telling you I’m not). For those of you out there who have written your own vows, was your thought process similar? Was it as daunting as I’m imagining? It just seems so final and like I’m going to finish and 10 minutes later I KNOW I’m going to think, “Damn, I meant to say _____!” Thank God for notecards, right?