Bucks · Think Happy Thoughts...

Rules to live by…at Starbucks

When you think of Starbucks, most likely you think of overpriced (amazing) holiday lattes and mocha frappucinos with whipped cream. You might think of green straws and Christmas cups. But when I think of Starbucks I think of the uppity (best word to NICELY describe them) Christmas shoppers and large groups of teenagers each ordering a different small frappucino with extra whipped cream and extra chocolate drizzle. I also think of how EVERY. SINGLE. CUSTOMER. Asks where the straws are and then seem extremely put out to find the milk/sugar/straw/napkin carts are around the corner (by Wetzel’s Pretzels) which is, of course, done for their convenience while waiting for their drinks during the busy rush. I also think of the annoying customers, the customers who ask for a stupid drink that takes my overworked brain far too long to comprehend. I think of the customers who talk down to me because I work at Starbucks, although this may be more because I work at Starbucks in the mall food court. I think of the customers who have names I couldn’t begin to think of how to spell or customers who have weird spellings of common names and then laugh or ridicule how their name is spelled on their cup. Just be happy I DID write your name so that the guy 3 behind you who ALSO orders a grande mocha with whip doesn’t take your cup and leave you to wait for his.

So to help out myself and all the other disgruntled Starbucks (really any coffee shop) employees, I’ll give you a few tips that ensures a happy trip for all.

  • If it’s busy, you are most likely waiting in line for a few minutes. Use this time to peruse the menu and decide what you would like to drink. That way, when the person taking your order comes to you, you don’t hold up the entire line because you were talking (loudly) on your phone and don’t know what you want to order.

Coffee queues at Starbucks

  • LISTEN. If you tell me 3 times that you want a caramel macchiato, but don’t answer me the 3 times I ask you WHAT SIZE, I will just stare at you until you do. We can’t write your triple shots, no foam, with whip on the cup until we know what size cup you’ll be purchasing.
  • Your name is written on the cup for your convenience so the people who ordered first get their drinks first. It really DOESN’T matter what the spelling is so long as the name is correct. So for instance, if someone at another Starbucks writes “Lindsey” on my cup instead of my spelling “Lindsay” IT’S OK! Conversely, if you have some ridiculous name or a foreign name please spell it or stick with your initials. Not that hard people. I know there are blogs dedicated to pictures of incorrectly spelled names on Starbucks cups, but is it really that crazy that someone spelled “Styles” instead of “Stiles” or “Lora” instead of “Laura”?


  • Yes, we know you ordered. We work here so we know the system so when you get to the REGISTER that means it’s time to pay. And no, I don’t have your cup in front of me so yes you will have to repeat your order. Also, soy milk and added shots cost extra. Not surprising.
  • While waiting for your drink, please take note that the barista IS making more than one beverage. Please don’t ask him/her every 30 seconds if Linda’s caramel cappuccino is there. When it is, we’ll tell you.
  • We don’t mind getting you a free cup of ice water, but it still takes a minute away from the drinks we’re making for paying customers, so please be patient while I finish the drinks I’m currently making and THEN I’ll get you your water. If you don’t want to wait, we sell bottled water for $1.95.
  • The milk and sugar are available for you to add to your coffee and make them perfect for you. This is complimentary. That doesn’t mean it should look like a bomb hit it every time we go to refill something and then need to spend 15 minutes away from the bar to clean it up. There are actual holes in the carts for you to be able to drop garbage through to the garbage can. WHAT A NOVEL IDEA! THROWING GARBAGE IN A GARBAGE CAN! Also, is it not second nature for people to take the napkin half an inch to their right and wipe up the coffee they spilled? Maybe then I wouldn’t get such a work out from scrubbing the sugar strewn all over the carts as well.



sb 1

  • Last, but not least, we are people who are working hard here. At the Starbucks I work at, the line wraps around the store and feeds out into the food court. We do a really good job of taking orders as quickly as possible and passing the cups onto the bar so your drink is made as close to the time you’re done paying as possible. But if you can see the line in front of you, it will take a few minutes for your drink to be ready. Also, this is a second job for some of us so after working 9 hours, I’m here for another 5 to serve you and then clean the entire place before I leave. A little courtesy would be nice, and if that’s too much to ask maybe you could get off your phone while I’m waiting for you to order, pay and then calling out Shaniquanaynay (spelled incorrectly of course) for 5 minutes when your drink is ready.


So this weekend while you’re finishing up your Christmas shopping, pop into Starbucks and order a Peppermint Mocha or Eggnog Latte (they’re delicious) and try to follow my rules. They might make your outing THAT much nicer!


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